“Ben told you to finish the website, and if you don’t do it, I swear to God I’m going to murder you in your sleep. “I’m just gonna live under a bridge and ask people riddles before they cross.”Ĥ2. If you ever speak to me in Spanish, please use the formal ‘usted.’ And no electricity after 6:00 PM.Ī couple more rules: if you ever watch a sad movie, you have to wear mascara so we can see whether or not you’ve been crying. You have to climb in through the back window. “We have a couple of house rules, though. “I’ll have a glass of your most expensive red wine mixed with a glass of your cheapest white wine served in a dog bowl. “She’s the cold, distant mother I never had…I love her.”ģ7. “Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge.”ģ5.
“Ann’s leaving town, and saying painful goodbyes to loved ones. High schooler: “Where’d you get that dress?”ģ3. And Halloween sound effect records from the 1950s. “I really only listen to like, German death reggae. “Is this gonna be one of those cool bachelorette parties where things get out of control and we murder someone, and then we all have to take a blood oath to never reveal our secret?”ģ0. “I will be providing my world famous $100 lap dances.”Ģ9. “I don’t care about that prize, but I’m gonna win because I want his happiness to go away.”Ģ8. “So, you’ve gone insane! That’s fun.”Īpril: “I’m going to murder you a thousand times.”Ģ6. “I wasn’t listening but I strongly disagree.”Ģ3. “I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I get drunk. “I declare that everything you are saying is stupid.”ġ9. “Being a responsible adult sucks butts.”ġ8. “I think we can agree that all wine tastes the same, and if you spend more than $5 on wine, you are very stupid.”ġ7. “I want to tell people what to do, then send them far away from me.”ġ5. “I very maturely and straightforwardly left anonymous comments about her online.”ġ3. (While being hugged) “Ow! You’re hurting me!”ġ1. “I guess I kind of hate most things, but I never really seem to hate you.”ĩ.
“I love games that turn people against each other.”ħ.
“I hate talking to people about things.”Ħ. “I can convince small children that I’m a witch.”ĥ. “Leslie said it was a ‘come as you were in the 90s’ party. “At least I didn’t make any new friendships.”ģ. Hate people, but love your partner? Hate socializing, but love being with friends? Repeatedly threatening to murder someone, but too kind to follow through? Read on for the very best of April.ġ. So we’ve compiled a list of our favorite April Ludgate’s most hilarious quotes that suit just about any mood. Well, the kind of wisdom a human-hating half-witch, half-wolf might give, at least. Through Leslie Knope (Amy Poehler)’s mentorship, supportive friendships, and her marriage to Andy Dwyer (Chris Pratt), April’s character blossomed while staying true to her hilarious core.įrom the angst of her moody teen years/early twenties to her relatable freak-outs about adulthood, April has provided us with many words of wisdom. We watched April Ludgate (Aubrey Plaza) go from a bored, distant and chaotic 19-year-old to an ambitious, caring, and chaotic young woman. In 2015, Parks and Recreation wrapped up and the world was forced to say goodbye to its favorite local government’s intern-turned-deputy-director.
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